WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE TWO DIFFERENT PEOPLE: Human vs Holy

I know what it feels like to be caught between "just enough Jesus to get you to next Sunday" and living a "normal" Monday through Saturday night life.

It's like living two lives.

I was "Holy Nikki" until I hit the church parking lot, then "Human Nikki" took over. Poor "Human Nikki" lived and slept with one eye open, waiting to be discovered as a fraud.

"I rarely told people outside of church that I was a Christian, because there were times I didn't act like one. I didn't want anyone to get the wrong idea about Jesus because of me. I didn't want to ruin His reputation."

- Nikki S. White, Me, Mom, & Jesus

Living with a divided heart is exhausting. One half beats steady and true, the other half races wildly in the other direction.

But here's what I discovered: our divided hearts are healed in God's presence.

We don't have to try harder to do better; we simply have to open the door to the rooms we're ashamed that He'll see and let Him sit there for awhile.

Jesus' disciples weren't made holy through perfect performance - they were transformed by staying close to Him.

Because wholeness and holiness exist in His Presence. 

And His Presence lives in you, the neat rooms and the messy ones.

When Jesus called His disciples to follow Him, they asked where He was staying. They needed to know how to get from where they currently were to where they wanted to be.

Jesus didn't tell them to get their act together first. Instead, He extended an open invitation to stay awhile: "Come and see."

Today, if you're seeing double, take a deep breath of grace and get reacquainted with the Lord.

Come human. He makes you holy.

Come as you are.